Six years ago today
January 30th, 2002, is a date that will live in infamy for my family and I, because, around 2PM that Wednesday afternoon, my father passed away in a traffic accident and left this place for the holy hills of Home. Following a period of increasing weakness, he swooned while driving to meet my mother halfway to town in an effort to save her a few miles in picking him up from home. He ran into a ditch and, due to no seat belt or air bag deployment, broke his neck upon impact.
I still feel that this was probably the best manner by which he could make his departure. Having been in steadily declining health for three years, thanks to two failed heart surguries and a number of other misbegotten yet recommended procedures by the cardiovascular butchers residing in Meridian, MS, at the time, he knew his time was drawing short. Worse, he was going to die only after withstanding a lingering existence of dependence and discouragement. This cut his remaining time suddenly short, but he neither saw it coming, nor did he suffer. The last thing he knew in this world was that he was riding down the road, and the next thing he saw was Glory.
The intervening six years have revealed themselves to simultaneously be an interminably long and stunningly short span of time. Interminably long in that it’s difficult to realize that he’s been gone for six *whole* years, and stunningly short in that it’s so painfully easy to go right back to that moment I learned of it. It’s like flipping to a chapter break upon reviewing the DVD of my life. Even now the recognition of loss registers all too freshly on my heart…in writing this, the keyboard letters are heavy rocks that give only after much effort, the screen letters blur as if they were oiled, the attached picture like scalding water that burns but feels oddly cool to the touch.
You asked the Lord for healing, yet their healing never came?
And in spite of all your efforts, the good Lord called them home….
And it’s hard to let go when you’re trying to hold on.
You pray, “Lord, you know what’s best, but I don’t understand why.”
But if you could hear your loved one speaking now to you,
They’d say, “you wouldn’t be grieving if you only knew.”
Your prayers have been answered, my sickness is gone;
Things look much better from heaven’s view.
The Son always shines, we’re having a time…if you only knew!”
I’m in the arms of Jesus, now…and I’m not suffering anymore.
Hand in hand, we’ll stroll together down heaven’s avenue….
We’re having a big celebration…if you only knew!”
Your prayers have been answered, my sickness is gone;
Things look much better from heaven’s view.
The Son always shines, we’re having a time…if you only knew!”
